Potty training: when to start and how to keep it calm

Every child goes at their own pace. In the US, potty training usually starts between 2 and 3, and most children are trained by 4.

Checked against AAP guidance on October 27, 2026

Is my child ready?

Most children gain bladder and bowel control between 18 and 24 months. You can start whenever you and your child both feel ready. Signs include:

  • Staying dry for at least 2 hours
  • Showing they need to go, like grunting, squatting or going still
  • Following simple instructions
  • Walking to the potty and helping to undress
  • Disliking a wet diaper
  • Asking to use the potty or wear big-kid underwear

It can help to wait during a big change, like a move, a new baby, or an illness or crisis in the family.

Getting started

  • Choose a child-sized potty that lets their feet rest flat on the floor. A book or toy can make sitting there more fun.
  • Make sitting on the potty part of the routine, for example first thing in the morning.
  • Let your child see you use the toilet and wash your hands. Use plain, positive words for body parts, pee and poop.
  • Once training starts, switch to underwear. Staying in diapers can tell children they don’t need to learn yet.
  • Teach girls to wipe from front to back, and teach every child to wash their hands well after using the potty.

Keeping it positive

Praise exactly what your child did, like “You sat on the potty all by yourself!” Doing it themselves is what matters, so there’s no need for treats.

Children control when they go, so pleading, punishing and power struggles tend to get in the way. Staying calm helps. Let your child take charge as much as they can, including helping to clean up after an accident.

Some children worry about being flushed away. Letting them flush the toilet themselves can help them feel in control.

Setbacks and night-time

Many children learn to pee in the potty before they learn to poop there, sometimes months apart. Each child’s order and speed is different.

Setbacks are common after changes like a new caregiver, a new brother or sister, or a move, and they often pass in a few days or weeks. If a setback doesn’t pass, or you can’t tell why it’s happening, talk with your pediatrician.

Staying dry at night often comes months or years after the daytime. Many children under 6 can’t stay dry overnight yet, and diapers at night are fine. After a wet night, offer support rather than blame, and don’t allow teasing. It isn’t your child’s fault.

Sources

This guide is for information only and is based on AAP guidance. It isn’t medical advice and doesn’t replace a doctor. Guidance can differ between countries, so follow your doctor’s advice and your local health service. If you have any concern about your baby’s health, always contact your doctor. In an emergency, call your local emergency number. If you’re worried about your child’s toileting, contact your pediatrician.